Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Dear Windows users - please keep using Windows.

Or

Mac snobbery taken to its only logical, rational conclusion.

I don't want windows users buying or using Macs. or iPhones. I guess if you need an iPod, that's fine.. but that's it.

Really.

I don't want Windows users using Apple products because they are
  • dimwitted
  • cheap
  • have no taste or style
  • lack a basic understanding of the difference between cost and value
  • have no concern about their lives, as they gladly piss them away installing anti-virus software, anti-spyware software, firewall software, and running Windows Update.
More to the point: They don't care. I do. So don't come over here.

For starters, they go into Apple Store and clog up the genius bar with their iPhone/Dell (not HP)* desktop computer problems. This means that i have to wait for them and their stupid, ignorant questions while i have a legitimate problem with my MacPro's shitty ATI x1900 video card.

Then they always seem to have a slight air about them that smacks of "well, yeah, while I'll give you the iPhone is infinitely better that all other cell phones, but i see no way that could translate when it comes to computers. I'm going home to drop my Packard Bell on my head because Macs are too expensive"

Look, I joined this cult BECAUSE it was NOT 95% compatible with the rest of the world. I joined it because they were (sorry) DIFFERENT. The screens were fscking amazing (21" Apple Trinitron on a IIci vs. Commodore 1702 on an Amiga 500). The mice fscking worked. And I saw QuickTime 1.0 playing video... VIDEO!?!?!? on a computer screen.

So, please, Windows users. I beg of you. You're happy where you are, I'm happy where I am. You would be more happy using a Mac (unless you use your computer to develop Windows programs), but I seriously doubt it matters that much to you because you're a freaking moron when it comes to computers.

So please - go away and use your superior Windows ... er... Dell computers.


*(Because there's no fscking difference between a Dell and an HP running windows, you twit - yet you'd never know it talking to a windows user)